by Mike Gamms
1.) Adam Sandler
“I aint farting on no snare drum.”
Before Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore, there was Pip, the dimwitted drummer in Airheads. In classic Sandler form, Pip occasionally resorts to baby talk and awkward dance moves.
2.) Steve Buscemi
“Do you think Tommy Lee sat around and waited for the bus? Man, he hustled. That’s how come he gets to live in the Hills and pork Heather Locklear. “
We’ve seen Buscemi play a creepy guy who wears lipstick, a creepy guy who gets shot in the face, and a creepy who wears someones face as a hat. In Airheads, you get to see him a play a creepy guy who plays Bass for the Lone Rangers.
3.) Brendan Fraser
“Who’d win in a wrestling match, Lemmy or God?”
Brendan Fraser is at his best when he plays an unevolved caveman. Chazz in Airheads is the next closest thing.
4.) Michael Richards
“It’s just that I made an appointment with my proctologist to get some type of cream or something.”
Before he was famous for being a racist, he was famous for being Kramer on Seinfeld. Before that he was in three of the greatest comedy movies of all time. (Airheads, UHF, and Problem Child).
5.) Judd Nelson
“Rockstars don’t go to jail. Christ, Vince Neil only did 30 days and he killed somebody.”
Judd Nelson is famous for playing a badass in a really pussy movie. He finally evens it out and plays a pussy in a really bad ass movie.
6.) Chris Farley
“A blonde wearing something tight and black? Great. Grand. Wonderful.”
Before Chris Farley famously yelled “Great! Grand! Wonderful!” as the irritable bus driver in Billy Madison he said the same line in Airheads. He also rips off a dude’s nipple ring.
7.) Michael McKean
“You’re screwing on my $1400 leather couch!”
In addition to his role in Airheads, McKean also starred in Spinal Tap, guaranteeing his place in The Rock and Roll Movie Hall of Fame.
8.) Ernie Hudson
“If these lookie-loos give you any trouble, I want you to cuff ’em and put ’em in the back of a squad car.”
Have you ever wondered what happened to the black guy from Ghostbusters? Well, he’s also in Airheads.
9.) Harold Ramis
“Van Halen sold alot of records after Roth left the group!”
Not only does Airheads have the black guy from Ghostbusters, it also has the nerdy guy from Ghostbusters.
10.) Allen Covert
“One guy came out, but he went right back in.”
Years before he starred in Grandma’s Boy, Airheads helped launch Allen Covert’s successful career being Adam Sandler’s friend.
11.) Joe Montegna
“There’s a saying Milo, if it’s too loud, you’re too old.”
Joe Montegna’s Ian the Shark may be the coolest radio DJ of all time. Sorry Howard Stern.
12.) Stuttering John Melendez
“I used to masturbate, constantly!”
Don’t get your panties in a bunch yet Stern fanboys, Stuttering John is in Airheads, too.
“I was editor of the school magazine!”
Lemmy is God!
14.) Amy Locane
“I’m guessing you woke up when the sun was warm, and rode your Harley up and down Melrose impressing all the 15 year old girls, right?”
Amy Locane proves her versatility as an actress, ranging from a Rock and Roll groupie to a Track and Field groupie.
15.) David Arquette
“What was she on the Clydesdale Scale? That’s how many Clydesdale’s it would take to tear her off your face.”
You could argue this role was the only redeeming thing in David Arquette’s entire career.
16.) Kurt Loder
“Cut! Cut! That can’t be right. You can’t pluralize The Lone Ranger.”
A relic of a dead age, when news was on television and music was on MTV.
17.) Beavis and Butthead
“Are you the Lone Rangers? We saw you guys at The Wheel Well last month, you guys suck!”
Unless Weird Al parodies your song, the only way to know you’ve really made it is when Beavis and Butthead make fun of you.